Believe in long-distance relationships?

[Anti Hacker]

"You know how I feel about long-distance relationships... will ours survive?"

I've known and loved someone for no less than three years, but now we live a 4 hour train journey apart and it will be at least another year if not two before we can be together again.

For my part, I do believe. I'm old fashioned and I believe in love. We still only love each other but we're both quite busy so we can't visit each other as often as we'd like to. Will emails/telephones/internet videoconferencing, or even "love", save this relationship?

Despite the lack of PSO in our lives recently (that's not really a reason, I'm joking ) I don't want to break up. I don't think I'll ever meet anyone else like this person.

Only time will tell.

Do you believe in long-distance relationships?

You can't answer this question yes or no, it depends on your circumstances directly. 4 hours is a long way away, and many people find video conferencing just shows them what they can't have and hurts them all the more. For others, it can help. It depends on who you are.

No, "emails/telephones/internet videoconferencing, or even "love" alone will not save a relationship. If one of the two of you finds the distance too unbearable there isn't much you can do. Love has to be mutual, and if the other half of the relationship doesnt love you enough to make things work out then it's not going to.

Sometimes two people will decide they had a really great time together but that it can't last any longer. There's nothing radically wrong with that, at least you have positive memories.

Distance is difficult, very difficult. I resolved that issue myself by moving closer to the person I love - but if you have just been forced apart... That's another story. You can't expect someone to withstand such pain every day if they're the kind of person who becomes damaged in that way - it isn't fair.

You need to have a talk the two of you about what is best. No one wants to be tied to their PC 24/7 waiting for someone to sign in or emails. People have lives to live. As long as you can live and love, there isn't a problem. Just make sure that for both of you, distance is not an issue. If it is for even one of you then it's not pleasant but you'll have to go your separate ways in order to become happy eventually.

I'm not saying these relationships dont work, I was in one for a very long time. But if the distance is not going to shrink again within about four years, then it's very painful and some people just can't take that at all. Like all other emotions and states of mind, love is not indestructible. It is very strong and powerful, but if it isn't sent both ways, one rope of love alone cannot and will not hold things together.