Possibly Leaving

[Bmil]

Well, as you all know, i have been a fairly active member of these forums and a die hard player of PSO (im still looking for my Yas 9k off and on). I havent played PSO for about half a month due to the fact that the one friend me and my sister used to play with has turned her life into **** because of a slut she met. This person has convinced her to shoplift, convincing her to try being a lesbian (wouldnt be so bad if she didnt dress like she did, ill be serious from this point on lol), and the worst of all, trying most drugs. We have talked to her, she wants to try it all, and we cant stop her. My sister is freaking out, and I do what i usually do, i shrug it off. People have always asked me how i can do that in the most tearfull of times, and i say one thing "I alreadly knew it was going to happen." The reason for this is simple, and i feel i can trust most of you with one last secret before my possible departure, most people have the ordinary dream, i dont. I have been able to see things i shouldnt, to see death, destruction, miracles, and crime. I have been able to see things BEFORE they happen, I have been given this curse from God to see into the future, either 3 years before it happens or 1 day. The catch to this is i see but a fragment, a fragment embedded in my memory for all eternity, a fragment i cannot get rid of no matter how hard i try. This has caused me to be depressed, and with that comes a state of being "numb" to any kind of emotion, love, hate, sorrow, happiness, anything. I saw my grandfathers death, and my mom doing CPR, i saw my dad taking me to various places, i saw christmases, i saw my swim team's trip to Vancouver, but what suprises me yet, is the things that havent happened, me rebreaking my finger, and the worst of all, i have seen my own death, on multiple occasion. I am a believer in more than anything but God, the Chaos Theory. The theory that any and every action has an effect on anything or everything anywhere in the universe, the flapping of a butterflies wings causing a tornado in Colorado, a kid jumping into the water causing an earthquake in China. Anything is possible, i know that better than anyone. I have told no one about this, and i trust you to have the dignity not to mock me, and the trust to believe me. This is no lie, this is nothing out of a book, this is my life.

And to the non believers, you have no proof this cant happen.