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Whats Yellow and smells like Green Paint?
Yellow Paint!

-Put 50 politicians and 50 lesbians into a room, and what do you get? 100 people who don't do dick.

-What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

-A blonde, brunette, and redhead share an apartment that contains a magical mirror that sucks anyone who tells it a lie into a unescapable viod. One day, the redhead goes up to it and says, "I think I have the nicest breasts in this place!". *Whoosh* She gets sucked in. A few hours later, the brunette goes up to the mirror and states, "I think that I my hair is perfect". *Whoosh* Into the void she goes. The next day the blonde walks up into the mirror and proclaims, " I think..." *Whoosh* She is never seen again.

-What to you get when you cross an atheist with a Jehova's Witness? Someone who knocks on your door for no reason whatsoever.

misterbud, your jokes are ace lol

These jokes are just getting stupid now!

Ivan Wrote:I callenge misterbud to a joke duel!

At least spell challenge correctly (Actually I'm not sure if I spelled it correctly either...)

Your "dump joke" was far funnier in person...needs the voice effects :p

Anyway...I accept your challenge.

Quote:I went into my proctologist's office for my first rectal exam. His new nurse, Elaine, took me to an examining room and told me to get undressed and have a seat until the doctor could see me. She said that he would only be a few minutes.

After putting on the gown that she gave me I sat down. While waiting I observed that there were three items on a stand next to the exam table: a tube of K-Y jelly, a rubber glove, and a beer.

When the doctor finally came in I said, "Look Doc, I'm a little confused. This is my first exam. I know what the K-Y is for, and I know what the glove is for, but can you tell me what the BEER is for?" At that Doctor Paul became noticeably outraged and stormed over to the door. He flung the door open and yelled to his nurse.......

"Darn it ELAINE!!!!!!!!!!! I said a BUTT LIGHT"

Quote:The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered, "Hello?"

Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?" "Yes", whispered the small voice. "May I talk with him?" the man asked. To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No." Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?" "Yes", came the answer. "May I talk with her?" Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there besides you?" the boss asked the child.

"Yes" whispered the child, "a policeman." Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?" "No, he's busy," whispered the child. "Busy doing what?" asked the boss. "Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman", came the whispered answer.

Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?" "A hello-copper" answered the whispering voice. "What is going on there?" asked the boss, now alarmed.

In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper." Alarmed, concerned, and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for?" Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle: "Me!"

Lol, wow. Those are great! Go misterbud!

I liked Sol's joke.I got one like that.
Whats the difference between a Chav and a Gorilla?

Ones thick and hairy, the others a gorilla.

And another chav joke (I love these):
What do chavs use as protection during sex?

A bus shelter.

Another...
2 chavs in a car, and theres no music playing. Whos driving?

The police.

to men in a car one says look out the windo and tell me if the indercater is working.so the man dose and replys yes no yes no yes no yes no.....

I didn't get Misterbud's last one... anyone care to explain it to me? ^_^;;

i challange SC-Poo Fly to a dual(jow the hell do u spell challange)

What about my sweet jokes?

Ivan Wrote:What about my sweet jokes?

what about them.